Why is Canary Wharf called Canary Wharf? It’s so misleading because there is no way you would find a canary in a place like that. Canaries are colourful, small and delicate and would be too intimidated by the hard-core, finance world that is the Wharf. They would be eaten alive, tramped on or simply go unnoticed as people charge to and from their plush offices. Canary Wharf is too sterile and is nowhere near a canary’s natural habitat.
Today I had a job interview on the Wharf and I felt just like an overwhelmed canary. I wondered how my colourful and different personality (or so I think!) would fit into such a place.
As people spilled out the tube, no one said a word. It was surreal that there were so many people charging about yet it was eerily quiet. It felt as if I was trapped in the movie Vanilla Sky. Remember when Tom Cruise wakes up one morning and the streets of New York are empty? That’s how I felt this morning at Canary Wharf. It was as if the people weren’t people. I felt like the only human among robots with no voiceboxes.
The interview was below average and I am sure I didn’t get the job. I didn’t actually want it in the first place. It is the complete opposite of me and does not in any way reflect my personality. Getting that job would be depressing and I would take it purely for the money. I could only handle it if I walked around with a mobile drip as antidepressants are being pumped into my veins intravenously. I feel like I have been roaming in my jobless desert for 40 years and this role is like going back to Egypt and putting the Promised Land on the back burner. But I’ll deal with that when (and if) I have to make that decision.
What annoys me most is that in interviews, the interviewer paints every job to be hard core and important. They check your credentials and experience and make the job sound way more complicated than I’m sure it really is. Today the interviewers made the role sound like I would be designing rockets or have the launch codes for nuclear warfare in my possession. In actual fact, in my humble experience, most jobs could be done by a competent 12 year old. That’s what I think. But then again, what I think doesn’t matter because they have a job and I don’t.
One day, I’ll find my natural habitat.